Bonus 1 - A Wild Slytherin Has Appeared Edit
|“|| Daily Prophet: Front Page|
Dec 22, 1988
By Martha Roseynib
The winter solstice Wizengamot session has traditionally been little more than a boring ritual in symbolism, hoisted upon our noble families before the far more interesting solstice rituals can take place later in the evening. Little did anyone expect for yesterday’s preliminaries to become the most talked about main event of the holiday. In front of a stunned audience, the chief warlock, Headmaster Albus Dumbledore, announced the reactivation of a long-thought dead line and asked that, ‘they with the required ring to please come forward.’
Murmurs and whispers then swept the chamber as the respected Lady Sunny Greengrass stood up from where she sat not five seats away from this reporter. She was dressed in full wizengamot robes and seemed to glide down the steps to the chief warlock’s dais. The crest that Lady Greengrass wore on her robes was instantly recognisable to anyone who might have attended Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry — the crest of Slytherin.
After being sworn in as Lord Slytherin’s proxy, Lady Sunny Greengrass then gave a speech to the chamber [see page 15 for full transcript], firmly establishing the newly resurrected house in the political centre. This reporter managed to catch up to the Wizengamot’s newest sitting member afterwards and asked what Lord Slytherin’s plans were and why he wasn’t presenting himself to the chamber in person, to which she replied, “Our Lord Slytherin is an extremely private person. He intends to reestablish Slytherin House inline with its first true ideals as espoused by Salazar Slytherin — ideals that have become somewhat maligned over the past few centuries.”
Readers will of course remember that Salazar Slytherin was one of the predominant advocates for blood purity, but Lady Greengrass’ speech seemed to insinuate otherwise. Who Lord Slytherin really is remains, for now, a mystery, but whoever he is, he would do well to remember one thing — rewriting history is a dangerous game and often backfires spectacularly. It has long been suggested that supporters of You-Know-Who are still out there. There might be no easier way for the new Lord Slytherin to re-radicalise them than by publicly claiming the grandfather of blood purism for his own pet project.
Last night was one of celebration for the Houses of Slytherin and Greengrass. In a speech given to a gathered audience of Magical Britain’s many neutrally aligned political houses, Lord Jacob Greengrass presented his oldest daughter, the current Greengrass heiress, nine-year-old Daphne Greengrass, and announced her betrothal to Lord Slytherin (age unknown). Lord Greengrass didn’t mention in his speech what compensation the MAAN House of Slytherin had presented to the MAAN House of Greengrass for the future loss of one of only two possible heiresses, but sources confirmed later that the amount was 11,700 galleons [£585,000], the largest brideprice ever seen in Magical Britain, and matched outside the country only by Gordon Carnegie for the hand of Rebecca Graves, during the infamous Carnegie affair in the late 1800s.
Last night also saw the first appearance of the wizard himself. Resplendent in timeless robes of acromantula silk and dragonhide, and wearing a mask of emerald green and black, he walked around the ballroom chatting with the many who wished to talk with him, seemingly quite content to allow his future wife to handle herself among the crowd, despite her young age — a confidence which it seemed was well placed.
When asked how she felt about being betrothed to Lord Slytherin, a remarkably well poised Heiress Greengrass was reported to have said, “I couldn’t be happier. My Lord Slytherin is an amazing wizard, and while there were other excellent matches available, I’m more than happy with this one.”
The future Lady Slytherin certainly doesn’t seem to have to worry about gold. Since Lord Slytherin’s seat was reactivated during the last winter solstice Wizengamot session, there has been much speculation about whether Lord Slytherin would be able to fit in among his peers, many of whom are among the richest wizards in the country. It seems that we now have an answer. “Paying the largest brideprice ever is a statement,” said an informed source who wished to remain anonymous. “A powerful statement which says, ’you’d better take me seriously, because I’m not messing around.’”
Powerful statement or not, it’s now clear that the houses of Slytherin and Greengrass represent a new united front, and we can almost certainly expect more political movements from the new alliance over the coming months.
“Lord Slytherin certainly knows how to dress. I’m glad the Wizengamot is finally getting some much needed fashion consciousness.” - Best Selling Novelist, Gilderoy Lockhart.
These are the first pictures ever published of the wealthy new lord since he emerged two months ago, but don’t get out the contracts just yet, ladies. He’s already taken.
“I was shocked when I heard that Lord Slytherin was already betrothed! And to the Greengrass Heiress!” - Weird Sisters guitarist, Kirley Duke.
No doubt many mothers up and down the country will be rapidly backpedalling on their plans to contact the new lord, and likewise, many lords and ladies will have to rethink their plans for their sons.
“Daphne Greengrass would certainly have been the most eligible consort in the country had she reached traditional courting age without already being betrothed. Now that she is, that distinction will instead fall to Heiress Pansy Parkinson of the noble house of Parkinson.” - Hallam Nott (Genealogy Expert)
But this still leaves the most important question unanswered. Where did Lord Slytherin get those shoes?! Despite putting our best and brightest here at Witch Weekly on the case, Slytherin’s wonderful pair of dragon hide boots remains just as mysterious as he is. Owls sent to the new lord return unopened. Records in the ministry say nothing. Gringotts refuses to comment. But fear not! We will not rest until we know where he got them!
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