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Corrections

List of errors found throughout the fanfiction. We use leadvone.com as a reference point and British English. Besides that it is always best to use standard grammar rules. If it's a title or proper noun, then capitalise — otherwise, lowercase. The only exception is when talking about the Gray, Light, and Dark when referring to factions.

Templates for copy paste Edit

Nay small Aye small

General Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
mind scape, mind-scape mindscape needs to be consistent. Replace All for all documents suggested
12
15
20
22
24
31
39
41
dream scape, dream-scape dreamscape needs to be consistent. Replace All for all documents suggested
41
42
Slytherin house Slytherin House needs to be consistent. Replace All for all documents suggested
1
4
5
7
13
15
17
22
31
33
35
40
41

Book 1 Edit

Chapter 1 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 1
He also knew the Headmaster He also knew the headmaster might be intended
doesn't make sense…. He knew  doesn't make sense… He knew  only three dots
indication with his interactions with Voldemort indication from his interactions with Voldemort
we're going to bend our self imposed rules. we're going to bend our self-imposed rules.
"How did he die in the first time-line?" "How did he die in the first timeline?"
I'd have to play a zero sum game I'd have to play a zero-sum game
by claiming the tile by claiming the title
prophecy to who ever I please, prophecy to whomever I please,
with different story telling forms and tools with different storytelling forms and tools
no apologies for head related injuries. no apologies for head-related injuries.
in the far corner of a high security in the far corner of a high-security
and revulsion on his parents faces and revulsion on his parents' faces
a bored sounding voice a bored-sounding voice
A four word sentence A four-word sentence
deliberately choose John to be deliberately chose John to be past tense
We already let John re-do the We already let John redo the
"In the grave-yard at the end "In the graveyard at the end
how he got such good grades without trying how he got such good marks without trying
Do not try to setup master Do not try to set up master separate words as a verb, setup or set-up as a noun,
not a deathly hollows style gift. not a Deathly Hallows-style gift. in-universe proper noun (also spelling and hyphen)
falling into he same trap falling into the same trap
showed itself to be the curled up, skin and bones form showed itself to be the curled-up skin-and-bones form 3 hyphens added and 1 comma taken away
James Potter, the True-Boy-Who-Lived James Potter, the true Boy-Who-Lived also hyphen removed
On the plus side, there were fewer dementors around, but on the negative side On the plus side, there were fewer dementors around, but on the minus side It’s either plus/minus or positive/negative that are the contrasts, not plus/negative or positive/minus.
was believed by all to be The-Boy-Who-Lived was believed by all to be the Boy-Who-Lived also hyphen removed
When the chamber of secrets had When the Chamber of Secrets had
In his two years at Hogwarts he'd never In his two years at Hogwarts, he'd never
The look of disgust and revulsion The looks of disgust and revulsion
but it was the only thing to do and, as messed up as it sounded, but it was the only thing to do, and, as messed up as it sounded,
and Harry Potter, The-True-Boy-Who-Lived, walked and Harry Potter, the true Boy-Who-Lived, walked also 2 hyphens removed
t was the veil of death t was the Veil of Death
moving towards the veil leaving Harry moving towards the Veil, leaving Harry
He was halfway to the veil He was halfway to the Veil
Harry finally replied again, "Err… who are Harry finally replied again, "Er… who are sfu: Not sure about it
side of the small room to him, side of the small room from him,
he motioned to the woman who inclined her head to Harry, "we have a bone to pick he motioned to the woman, who inclined her head to Harry. "We have a bone to pick
Death seemed personable enough, "does this bone have Death seemed personable enough. "Does this bone have
If we hadn't have done that, If we hadn't done that,
Harry’s looked nonplussed. "But… It's not my fault if I was a damn horcrux! Harry looked bewildered. "But… it's not my fault if I was a damn horcrux!" I suggest using a different word than nonplussed, as it was used just a few paragraphs before. Maybe bewildered?
seless sack of wizard that called himself The-Boy-Who-Lived failed useless sack of wizard that called himself the Boy-Who-Lived failed hyphen removed
So, Dumbledore told John… That made sense. So, Dumbledore told John… that made sense.
two Dark Lords in his life, both of which two Dark Lords in his life, both of whom
towards the twinkly-eyed towards the twinkly eyed “Twinkly” is an adverb, and adverbs do not require hyphens in these cases. They naturally modify adjectives, so the hyphen does not bring any clarity to the sentence.
he was no longer able to manipulate events and your brother he was no longer able to manipulate events. Your brother
  1. Previously was a run-on sentence.
other flimsy trumped up charge?" other flimsy trumped-up charge?"
his horrific personality, he had a four year lead his horrific personality. He had a four-year lead
"…" "…" Delete entirely, both instances. I suspect LVE wanted to use it to indicate Harry was thinking, but it is unnecessary and just adds confusion to the chapter.
"Wait… That's why he let "Wait… that's why he let
give him a third chance! give him a third chance!” quotation missing
who also thinks they are our chosen. who also thinks he is our chosen.
that opened the chamber." that opened the Chamber."
against Dumbledore you need against Dumbledore, you need
"No no no, Harry. "No, no, no, Harry. two commas added
political elite…"—Harry stretched his chin—"…On political elite…." Harry scratched his chin. "…On delete em dash
Any death eaters or allies Any Death Eaters or allies
for allies—A moment of silence passed—Slytherin or allies.” A moment of silence passed. “S delete em dash
"Well done young champion "Well done, young champion
"That's as well as maybe "That's as well as may be
let house rivalries detract you let house rivalries distract you
to bring to your side. to bring to your side." quotation missing
team building exercises. team-building exercises.
as a pile of rags and bones can. as a pile of rags and bones could.
Death spoke up. "Mister Potter Death spoke up, "Mister Potter
Fate interjected, "so long as Fate interjected. "So long as
you have a free pass.” quotation missing
back through the veil. back through the Veil.

Chapter 2 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 2
"Um… Yew? "Um… yew? not sure
It's the oldest Yew in the It's the oldest yew in the should be small
absolute right of the King to rule absolute right of the king to rule not sure
Oh… He might also have spotted Oh… he might also have spotted not sure
and aggressive with her question monologue, and aggressive with her questions monologue, not sure
of alerting Dumbledore to his presence. of alerting Dumbledore of his presence. not sure
While Diagon alley looked While Diagon Alley looked spelled wrong, source
If old man only knew. If the old man only knew. word missing?
a tiny lighting bolt killing a tiny lightning bolt killing spelled wrong
it would give him early warning it would give him an early warning spelled wrong?
"Err… Thank you, "Err… thank you, not sure
and happiness in the back of Harry's cornea. and happiness across Harry’s retinas.’ Or possibly ‘... back of Harry’s eyes’ the cornea is just the part at the very front of the eye
the comforts of the tearoom in practise the comforts of the tearoom in practice noun
They were no-where to be seen They were nowhere to be seen
the glossy paged brochure the glossy-paged brochure
"Oh no… oh shit! shit!"Oh no… oh shit! Shit!New sentence
"What if someone uses them! Oh shit! shit!"What if someone uses them! Oh shit! Shit!
some less deserving cut purse some less deserving cutpurse
07 Great British Pounds 07 Pounds Sterling (without Great British) British language use
thestral herd in the British isles thestral herd in the British Isles
a hint of smile played across a hint of a smile played across
As his finger tips wrapped As his fingertips wrapped
and aggressive with her question monologue, and aggressive with her questioning monologue,
Chapter two: Chapter Two:
To do that he needed To do that, he needed
if you were helpless everything you were helpless, everything
not the imperius, nothing could not the imperius; nothing could
the imperius — you just had the imperius—you just had space removal
unforgivable — poor little unforgivable—poor little space removal
wand wielding weakling wand-wielding weakling
OWL in defence stumbled OWL in defence who stumbled
muggle repelling wards muggle-repelling wards
charms — as he charms—as he space removal
sell him a wand, he was too young sell him a wand; he was too young
be any good — they'd be any good—they'd space removal
If he were caught he'd be in If he were caught, he'd be in
length as the elder wand. length as the Elder Wand.
was a short plump woman was a short, plump woman
Yes, it is, where are you parents dear? Yes, it is. Where are your parents, dear? 4 things
future-heartbreaker future heartbreaker no hyphen
Well dear. Why don't you Well, dear, why don't you 3 things. 2 commas and one lower case
"Thank you Mrs…?" "Ruthson dear." "Thank you, Mrs…?" "Ruthson, dear." 2 commas
and Dad now — they're and Dad now—they're space removal
Not to worry dear, Not to worry, dear,
holiday filled holiday-filled
don't panic, its probably don't panic; it's probably two things: semicolon and apostrophe
shit! shit!." shit! shit!" Extra period removed
less deserving cut purse less-deserving cutpurse two things :)
smiled… Breakfast time. smiled… breakfast time.
his intended — The Ankerwycke his intended target—The Ankerwycke two things: word missing and space removal
and included passages and contained passages twice included back to back, so instead contained
king Henry VIII, had started king Henry VIII had started comma deletion
and England, and the and England and the comma deletion
over him — something over him—something space removal
with an audible, "phew." with an audible, "Phew."
'Fight-or-flight' 'fight-or-flight'
All in all it could have All in all, it could have
who — because of their who—because of their space removal
apparate — should apparate—should space removal
It was small and crept It was small, and crept comma
to tombstone, as though to tombstone as though no comma
chest was bare — the shirt chest was bare—the shirt space removal
You can see me right? You can see me, right? comma
you're magical aren't you? you're magical, aren't you? comma
both silly and aggressive with her question monologue The list has this on it twice. First, it adds an S to the word question... ...That is incorrect and reads awkwardly. I see it also corrected to “questioning” later in the list, and that is much better
and, 'your sight,' …are you a and, 'my sight,' …are you a
young man," a hint of smile young man." A hint of a smile 3 things. dot and two a's
she smiled, "my name is she smiled. "My name is two things
single branch of the Llangernyw Yew, to make a single wand single branch of the Llangernyw Yew, to make a single wand too many singles
How do you, a child, want to defeat him? This sentence just reads oddly. The reader thinks it ought to go something like “How can you, a child, hope to defeat him?”... ...But that’s not what it says. She asks why he’d want to defeat Voldy, since he’s a child. If that’s what you’re going for, leave as is. Otherwise, consider revising
child of prophecy — singled child of prophecy—singled space removal
herself — to do the herself—to do the space removal
Please Harry, take what yo Please, Harry, take what yo comma
Before you go… can I see Before you go… may I see Angelystor uses old language, thus may
lightning bolt shaped lightning bolt-shaped
Hogwarts — a place Hogwarts—a place space removal
who cared, was tiny. who cared was tiny. no comma
bristling with muggle repelling bristling with muggle-repelling
architecture — row after row architecture—row after row
square, curved, sloping roofs square, curved sloping roofs Delete second comma and how can something be squared and curved :P
of one building of course. of one building, of course. comma
a melting roman temple a melting Roman temple
unwound his make-shift unwound his makeshift
past the guards, up into past the guards up into no comma
250 pounds — the results 250 pounds—the results space removal
English accented child English-accented child
Merlin he loved goblins Merlin, he loved goblins
was looking for — a small was looking for—a small space removal
And next to the counter, And finally, next to the counter,
a black, full-length, duster style thestral shell cordovan coat with a robe style hood. a full-length black thestral shell cordovan duster with a robe-style hood huge revision. read carefully
"Can I help, Sir?" "Can I help, sir?"
Ah, well done, Sir. Ah, well done, sir.
strands — in a wand core Ten strands—in a wand-core braid. removal and hyphen
on the mannequin." on the mannequin. unneeded quotation mark
a smoke filled orb a smoke-filled orb
it, eh, Young Man?" it, eh, young man?"
muggle made wand muggle-made wand
Err… Thank you, Erthank you,
Err” is a word that means a mistake or miscalculation, such as “err on the side of caution,” while “er” is the sound one makes when thinking or when stumped. That is why I am changing all these Err’s to Er’s.

Chapter 3 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 3
loopholes or unthought of problems. loopholes or unthought-of problems.
but decided wasn't worth it but decided it wasn't worth it
he wanted it be on his terms. he wanted it to be on his terms.
digging himself a passage way digging himself a passageway
Filling the space of the entrance of the passage at or beyond to avoid the double 'of'
It was now mid September It was now mid-September
stealing other high value items stealing other high-value items
Hell, they taught thirteen year-olds Hell, they taught thirteen-year-olds
Harry wasn't there any more Harry wasn't there anymore
a random fire ball a random fireball
detail with pin point accuracy. detail with pinpoint accuracy.
reaching down into a desk draw reaching down into a desk drawer
It was now mid October and It was now mid-October and
multi compartment, shrinkable multi-compartment, shrinkable
for early to mid November for early to mid-November
He was working to a schedule He was working on a schedule
No really?, but he shoved No really? But he shoved
"Fidelius Occultum!" "Fidelius occultum!"

Chapter 4 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 4
hidden in it's shadow. hidden in its shadow.
as a blow-him-away wind shredded his fog. as a blow-you-away wind shredded his fog.
got my ass handed to me got my arse handed to me Lord Greengrass would think ass = donkey
ill pass to the conquer of ill pass to the conqueror of
where upon I'd be rolled out whereupon I'd be rolled out
A small girl with weasley-red A small girl with Weasley-red
to shore up the rag tag alliance to shore up the ragtag alliance
by a Dark sided wizard by a Dark-sided wizard
being humoured less then thirty being humoured less than thirty
just completely over powered him just completely overpowered him
me by an eight year old me by an eight-year-old
and blood related within and blood-related within
'face my destiny,' where upon 'face my destiny,' whereupon
and chatting to his Lady Greengrass. and chatting with his Lady Greengrass.
Jacob stared after the man who Jacob stared at the man who
candidate for heir to the Slytherin candidate for an heir to the Slytherin
had died on the end of had died at the end of
with the ascendancy to the with the ascendancy of the
was blown away with a miniature was blown away by a miniature
in the middle of room in the middle of the room
Shall we retire to somewhere more Shall we retire somewhere more
morphed themselves to his new form morphed themselves into his new form
anger flowing into him. anger flowing through him.
the much worshiped Boy-Who-Lived the much worshipped Boy-Who-Lived British English
"Greengrass manor!" "Greengrass Manor!"
Noble house of Greengrass, was looking Noble House of Greengrass, was looking
born on the July thirty-first born on the thirty-first of July 31st of July as an alternative
"To be decided upon later no doubt? "To be decided upon later, no doubt? comma
the much worshiped Boy-Who- the much worshipped Boy-Who-
weasley-red hair Weasley-red hair
up the rag tag alliance up the rag-tag alliance

Chapter 5 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 5
an over whelming sense of déjà vu an overwhelming sense of déjà vu
being caught in a bare faced lie being caught in a bare-faced lie
were looking at him, at though were looking at him, as though
"Its okay, Harry. You "It's okay, Harry. You
silence filing the hall silence filling the hall
red faced, heart leaping red-faced, heart leaping
I'm a bit better then that. I'm a bit better than that.
She looked over the boy. She looked over at the boy.
Daphne was on a buzz high. Daphne was on a buzzing high.
We've still got a ways to go We've still got ways to go
had this conversation, Okay?" had this conversation, okay?"
the other wizard's had been the other wizards had been
take the swearing in oath take the swearing-in oath
Noble house of Slytherin, a small amount Noble House of Slytherin, a small amount
As Lord Slytherin, the head of said Most Ancient and Noble house, As Lord Slytherin, the head of said Most Ancient and Noble House,
after grim, the god of war after Grim, the god of war
sitting in the manor foyer sitting in the manor's foyer
She stilled. “Where I live? She froze. “Where I live?
other manors of the ancient and noble houses other manors of the Ancient and Noble Houses
Her calves, thighs, and butt were on fire. Her calves, thighs, and butt felt like they were on fire. not sure abt this one, just well, they aren’t actually on fire, idk.
standing in a huddle around one of the seats, and, with a politician's instincts for standing in a huddle around one of the seats, and with a politician's instincts for remove second comma
let fate have her way let Fate have her way
grew as rumours flew among them. grew as rumours flew amongst them.
Some voices were raised, some looked horrified makes it sound like the voices looked horrified
Could they with the required ring, please come Could they, with the required ring, please come comma
She’d been sat here for hours She’d been sitting there for hours

Chapter 6 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 6
"Harry's math skills are beyond A-level level." "Harry's maths skills are beyond A-level."
Her eye's flickered, Her eyes flickered,
drew out a text-book of his own. drew out a textbook of his own.
than the snails pace her than the snail's pace her
Your Mum suggested twice a week Your mum suggested twice a week
magic in their every day lives magic in their everyday lives
magics exist specificity to stop magics exist specifically to stop
to cram a lifetimes worth of to cram a lifetime's worth of
She felt she'd just been received a just received or just been given
through her all-night had been through her all night had been
"No. I'm okay. Its just…" "No. I'm okay. It's just…"
came from the trap door came from the trapdoor
who dealt in rules and logic. who dealt with rules and logic.
he'd think she were insane. he'd think she was insane.
and looked around the trunk that and looked at the trunk that
Mrs. Granger continued, Mrs Granger continued, Mrs. is American, Mrs British
Her eye's flickeered Her eye flickered OR Her eyes flickered
she asked. Not quite believing she asked, not quite believing punctuation and capitalization

Chapter 7 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 7
the shape of lightning bolt. of a lightning bolt
they did all that too you they did all that to you
to open the chamber of secrets to open the Chamber of Secrets in-universe proper noun
week from tonight at mid-night week from tonight at midnight
and those who posses the secret and those who possess the secret
and he'd asked it back. and he'd asked for it back.
and to a lesser extant and to a lesser extent
non noble halfbloods non-noble halfbloods
If feels amazing. It feels amazing.
a final disgust filled glare. a final disgust-filled glare.
Pinky of your right hand Little finger of your right hand British English
slipped the ring on her pinky slipped the ring on her little finger British English
by the sad looking by the sad-looking
couldn't take this any more, she couldn't take this anymore, she
he couldn't take any more, calmness he couldn't take anymore, calmness
mention such a practise mention such a practice
you don't need it any more." you don't need it anymore."
just outweighing fear of getting just outweighing the fear of getting
She was still dreaming? Was she still dreaming?
difficult to continuing liking difficult continuing liking OR difficult to continue liking
A younger looking Mrs. Potter A younger looking Mrs Potter British English
Mrs. Potter reached Mrs Potter reached
Why did Mrs. Potter have two Why did Mrs Potter have two
"Professor!" Mrs. Potter cried "Professor!" Mrs Potter cried
A quick check in with Mrs. Weasley A quick check in with Mrs Weasley
"Yah." "Yeah."
and kicked up of the damp floor and kicked up of the damp ground
Hi Ginny. Hi, Ginny. comma
Ambitious aren't we? Ambitious, aren't we?

Chapter 8 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 8
"Nah. Give it a half-hour. Let her "Nah. Give it half an hour. Let her British English
drab looking London town houses, drab-looking London town houses,
the buildings were gray the buildings were grey
before he'd started to chow down before he'd started to tuck in ‘chow down’ is extremely uncommon in British English, but ‘tuck in’ is very common
window-shopping the quidditch store window-shopping at the quidditch store
corners. Its wearer was owner or bearer people wear hairstyles, but they don’t wear their hair
an ornate dinning table an ornate dining table
to keep your father knowing you're here to keep your father from knowing you're here
just to get good grades in school just to get good marks in school nobody uses grades in British English
without the subject's knowing. without the subject's knowledge.
of drab looking London town houses, of drab looking London townhouses,
to start duelling practise to start duelling practice noun with c, verb with s
his shoulder length blond hair his shoulder-length blond hair
from the old London town house from the old London townhouse
its important to get it back it's important to get it back
Or cuts off you hand?" Or cuts off your hand?"
headquarters of most innovative headquarters of the most innovative
foot-shaped impressions in the ground, foot-shaped impressions on the ground,
[January, 1990 (Two [January 1990 (Two no comma
looking into the silvery-gray looking into the silvery-grey
Kuh. It wasn't easy getting Pfft. It wasn't easy getting The audio version by Soren sounds like a snort here

Chapter 9 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 9
sisters, one born a half-hour after the sisters, one born half an hour after the British English
and was now a half-hour older than the and was now half an hour older than the British English
along the riverbank for a half-hour, and along the riverbank for half an hour, and British English
the most sought after artefacts the most sought-after artefacts
The great accounting we call it. The Great Accounting we call it. (in-universe proper noun)
two and a-half years ago two-and-a-half years ago
stories of axe wielding debt stories of axe-wielding debt
at fixed times through-out at fixed times throughout
and into a well appointed waiting and into a well-appointed waiting
crisis in the Goblin nation. crisis in the Goblin Nation.
before any age related decision before any age-related decision
in a large see through box by in a large see-through box by
curse took a lot of practise, curse took a lot of practice,
waiting for the throw back. waiting for the throwback.
red and white smoke stack, red and white smokestack,
as already half way into as already halfway into
and give him draught of living and give him a draught of living
solution made it all the more easy. solution made it all the easier.
not yet here was a snowy. not yet here was a snowy one.
pushed it through a banister, pushed it through a bannister, British English
cloak of liquid cloth spilled out. cloak of liquid cloth spilt out.
Like I said, I like the interesting ones." As I said, I like the interesting ones."
Kuh. An elegant flower that opens just as the snow and ice starts melting.  Gah. An elegant flower that opens just as the snow and ice starts melting.  Not sure about the word kuh...

Chapter 10 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 10
A half-hour later, Harry hovered Half an hour later, Harry hovered British English
being heard, nor smelt being heard, nor smelled smelled also works.
from a half foot away. from a few inches away nobody says from half foot
with a fine shine of gore. with a fine sheen of gore. not sure
She collapsed to the ground." She collapsed to the ground. quotation marks not needed
lightning-bolt ring on her right pinky. lightning-bolt ring on her right little finger.
He bolted onto the grand staircase and He bolted into the grand staircase and not sure
lowered their lances, baring his path lowered their lances, barring his path
of the spiders with an over powered of the spiders with an overpowered
That would just be confunding." That would just be confounding." not sure
Half way up, she caught sight Halfway up, she caught sight
Lord Slughorn was a key-stone Lord Slughorn was a keystone
We'll now take a twenty minute unscheduled We'll now take a twenty-minute unscheduled
He leapt though the opening. He leapt through the opening.
and anywhere we could carries and anywhere we could, carries
wizard, with a full gray beard. wizard, with a full grey beard.
The grand warlock The Chief Warlock Source

Chapter 11 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 11
over the red head's shoulder, over the redhead's shoulder,
Where did you run away too? Where did you run away to?
John arrived in the dinning room John arrived in the dining room
"That's right, Son." Glad to see you taking your body seriously, now. "That's right, Son. Glad to see you taking your body seriously, now." quotation mark wrong place
Can I talk you about it? Can I talk to you about it?
a small lean stake, a small lean steak,
Half way through demolishing Halfway through demolishing
had one in the last time-line had one in the last timeline
He father looked over his copy His father looked over his copy
The ink and parchment was rife The ink and parchment were rife
I was about to head into the office. I was about to head in to the office.
Wha? Wha-? hyphen

Chapter 12 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 12
kitchen and dinning room. kitchen and dining room.
Perhaps a friend of one your friends Perhaps a friend of one of your friends
time to meet any one? time to meet anyone?
Do you have a boy friend? Do you have a boyfriend?
John climbed The Burrow stairs John climbed the Burrow's stairs
She struggled on her bindings She struggled against her bindings
no-longer bound, but still no longer bound, but still
The twin's heads peeped around The twins' heads peeped around
and gave duel, theatrical bows and gave dual, theatrical bows
with lots of extraneous hand waving." with lots of extraneous hand waving. quotation marks not needed
like to formerly invite you like to formally invite you
the ring on her pinky. the ring on her little finger.
into her right pinky into her right little finger
She collapsed side-ways on the bed She collapsed sideways on the bed
The second-hand moved. The second hand moved.
Ancient and Noble house of Potter Ancient and Noble House of Potter
out of The Burrow next year out of the Burrow next year
vibrations on his right pinky. vibrations on his little finger.
The grin vanished. Oh, Damn. The grin vanished. Oh, damn. Or: Oh. Damn.
stroll to the leaky cauldron. stroll to the Leaky Cauldron.
He arrived in Ottery St. Catchpole He arrived in Ottery St Catchpole
cloak, and a poly-juice. cloak, and a polyjuice.
never actually used poly-juice never actually used polyjuice
Making a split decision Making a split-second decision and may want to change the ‘second’ later in the sentence to avoid repetition
—Dragons can wait. Family comes first. dragons can wait. Family comes first.
"Yes, It's me, but "Yes, it's me, but
grabbed the silver lighting-bolt grabbed the silver lightning-bolt
His skin scrapped off His skin scraped off
"Holy Shit!" "Holy shit!"
he shot off duel stunners he shot off dual stunners
the second young-man hit the second young man hit
he'd escaped The Burrow, he'd escaped the Burrow,
echoing off the inferi-filled cave walls. echoing off the inferi-filled cave's walls. as it is, it implies the cave walls are filled with inferi
directly into The Burrow's own directly into the Burrow's own
the lack of wand, the lack of a wand,
or while at the Dursleys or while at the Dursleys'
formally known as Snowy formerly known as Snowy
voice called though the fruit voice called through the fruit
that is not a hair pin that is not a hairpin
Do you have a boy friend? Do you have a boyfriend?
than in the last time-line than in the last timeline
only been a fourteen year-old only been a fourteen-year-old
could get the time-line back could get the timeline back
She collapsed side-ways on She collapsed sideways on
contained a back-up stash contained a backup stash
and two years of prison and two years in prison
A steel voice rang around the kitchen A steel voice rang through the kitchen
than first time around. than the first time around.
at down adjacent to Mrs. Tonks at down adjacent to Mrs Tonks
Mrs. Tonks raised an Mrs Tonks raised an
all the other Mr. Mrs. cases in the chapter with Mr and Mrs
Noble house of Potter. John is my Noble House of Potter. John is my

Chapter 13 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 13
Mum! Dad! We're going to be late! And you now know goblins don't like to be kept waiting. "Mum! Dad! We're going to be late! And you now know goblins don't like to be kept waiting." quotation marks missing
sign here and the house of Granger sign here and the House of Granger
deal with 'their kind.' half-blood deal with 'their kind,' half-blood comma
decapitated mess a coins toss away decapitated mess a coin's toss away
He pushed a filled out form He pushed a filled in form (British English)
contained a lot more legalise contained a lot more legalese
she was loathed to take off she was loath to take off
she arrived outside Madam Malkins Robes she arrived outside Madam Malkin's Robes
Oh, Damn. Not pureblood. Oh, damn. Not pureblood.
many of it's own customs many of its own customs
spelled out to new comers. spelled out to newcomers.
in her parent's back garden. in her parents' back garden.
lesser-known schools in the British Isles. lesser-known schools in Britain.
wand makers use different combination of wand cores wand makers use different combinations of wand cores
I had the brother wand to Voldemort I had the brother wand to Voldemort's
caster that looses the subsequent caster that loses the subsequent
It's not common wand law. It's not common wand lore.
for most of her parent's books for most of her parents' books
She leant in to him, She leant into him,
around with the awe struck countenance around with the awestruck countenance
said a middle aged witch said a middle-aged witch
hair so light is was almost blond. hair so light it was almost blond.
spelled out to new comers." spelled out to newcomers."
Obviously other wand makers use Obviously other wandmakers use
He held up his fifteen inch yew He held up his fifteen-inch yew
owing to their ability to be re-born from owing to their ability to be reborn from
known to wizard kind, known to wizardkind,
The wand maker handed her The wandmaker handed her
feel his excitement pressed against her, feel his excitement pressing against her,
The wizarding world uses dragon in The wizarding world uses dragons in
just point out that of course they'd love just point out that of course, they'd love
of them aren't well spelled out of them aren't well spelt out

Chapter 14 Edit

Wrong Corrected Reasoning Status
Chapter 14
book and slid it from its brother's snug embrace. book and slid it from its brothers' snug embrace.
didn't smile back and her smile faulted. didn't smile back and her smile faltered.
"That was Okay? Wasn't it?" "That was okay? Wasn't it?"
We have enumerable treasures We have innumerable treasures
of course, and Susan, It'll be of course, and Susan. It'll be should be a dot
Alex couldn't help notice that John Alex couldn't help but notice that John word missing
toy of the Black's broke toy of the Blacks broke
What were left were the high What was left were the high
held it close to like a shield held it close like a shield ( or ‘close to her’)
clarinets, moulding into trumpets, clarinets, melding into trumpets,
feeling was were the similarities ended. feeling was where the similarities ended.
If her grand father was correct If her grandfather was correct
melted lead it's focus was so intense. melted lead its focus was so intense.
Did the box just Meow? Did the box just meow?
she grinned a marauders grin she grinned a marauder's grin
good sniff as padfoot, good sniff as Padfoot,
It's from my lord. It's from my lord." quotation mark missing
declaration, less he put your son declaration, lest he put your son
even more insane then them even more insane than them
if she'd a bit less headstrong if she'd been a bit less headstrong
about the Hogwarts express? about the Hogwarts Express? in-universe proper noun
table where to grown-ups sat. table where the grown-ups sat.
eyes to see Luna's gray ones eyes to see Luna's grey ones
and plied them off, and prised them off,
takes a decade of practise takes a decade of practice noun
It is now more obvious then It is now more obvious than
he's in his mid twenties he's in his mid-twenties
her own box shaped her own box-shaped
intro to a fifty-some year old intro to a fifty-some-year-old
was a half blood was a halfblood
Alexandra face palmed, again. Alexandra facepalmed, again.
John stopped half way through John stopped halfway through
The first born children The firstborn children
ready for the tell tale tickling ready for the telltale tickling
in another minute long hug. in another minute-long hug.
a bookmark into the same page a bookmark on the same page
heard you're still top of class, heard you're still top in class, ‘Top in class’ has more a feeling of ‘great job, you’re doing well’

‘Top of class’ feels a little bit more ‘you are superior to those lesser plebs’

It's Sirius referring to Alex. He does not feel like someone bragging in that position

a large grin forming over his face. a large grin forming on his face.
and she felt the girl wrap around her, wrapping or wrapped not sure
it's the only way isn't it? it's the only way, isn't it? comma
come down wearing a gray dress if she'd come down wearing a grey dress if she'd
her with her silvery gray stare. her with her silvery grey stare.
first generation magicals to the international statue of secrecy first generation magicals to the international statute of secrecy typo

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